Tråden för stötande skämt

[steffe]

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Jag visslade på en snubbe för att få ett papper påskrivet!
Han blev skitförbannad och undrade om han var en hund.
Jag svarade att han var nog på svärmorsnivå för upp till hundnivå skulle han aldrig komma.
Hans chef fick skriva på papperet istället.

 

[Ulvhamne]

 

[Hoztic]

 

[Ulvhamne]

View attachment 501943

Moootorbike

 

[steffe]

 

[sportbike]

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Usch vilket skitjobb

 

[Hoztic]

A blonde girl came home from college one day and told her mother that a boy had paid her a dollar to climb up a ladder and get his ball from off the roof. "You silly girl," her mother said, "he just wanted you to climb the ladder so he could look up your skirt and see your undies." The next day the same little girl came home from college and told her mother that the same boy gave her a dollar again to climb a ladder and get his ball off the roof. Just before her mother could admonish her for being silly, the little girl said, "No mum, this time I tricked him. I wasn't wearing any undies!"

 

[Hoztic]

 

[steffe]

 

[L. Mäkinen]

 

[Hoztic]

A young engineer was leaving the office at 3.45 p.m. when he found the acting CEO standing in front of a shredder with a piece of paper in his hand.
"Listen," said the Acting CEO, "this is a very sensitive and important document, and my secretary is not here. Can you make this thing work?"
"Certainly," said the young engineer. He turned the machine on, inserted the paper, and pressed the start button.
"Excellent, excellent!" said the Acting CEO as his paper disappeared inside the machine, "I just need one copy."

Lesson: Never, ever, assume that your boss knows what he's doing.

 

[Hoztic]

Joe had asked Bob to help him out with the deck after work, so Bob just went straight over to Joe's place. When they got to the door, Joe went straight to his wife, gave her a hug and told her how beautiful she was and how much he had missed her at work. When it was time for supper, he complimented his wife on her cooking, kissed her and told her how much he loved her.
Once they were working on the deck, Bob told Joe that he was surprised that he fussed so much over his wife. Joe said that he'd started this about six months ago, it had revived their marriage, and things couldn't be better. Bob thought he'd give it a go. When he got home, he gave his wife a massive hug, kissed her and told her that he loved her. His wife burst into tears.
Bob was confused and asked why she was crying. She said, "This is the worst day of my life. First, little Billy fell off his bike and twisted his ankle. Then, the washing machine broke and flooded the basement. And now, you come home drunk!"

 

[Hoztic]

 

[MickeZX7R]

En äkta Sugkuki!
View attachment 501738

- Jeez vilken bamsehjälm!

 

[Felix83]

- Jeez vilken bamsehjälm!

AI är fortfarande inte helt hemma på det där med proportioner, antar jag...

 

[Ulvhamne]

AI är fortfarande inte helt hemma på det där med proportioner, antar jag...

AI gör massor av konstiga fel hela tiden, med ansikten och kroppar korrigerar våra hjärnor, men med allt annat ser vi det tydligt.

 

[steffe]

 

[SJP]

AI gör massor av konstiga fel hela tiden, med ansikten och kroppar korrigerar våra hjärnor, men med allt annat är vi det tydligt.

AI ?!

 

[steffe]

 

[steffe]