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Twins have more fun
Little Johnny was sitting on a park bench munching on one candy bar after another. After the 6th one, a man on the bench across from him said: "Son, you know eating all that candy isn't good for you. It will give you acne, rot your
teeth, & make you fat."
Little Johnny replied: "My grandfather lived to be 107 years old." The man asked: "Did your grandfather eat 6 candy bars at a time?" Little Johnny answered: "No, he minded his own fucking business!"
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Little Jenny comes home from playing at Johnny's house.
"Hey Mom, guess what! Johnny's got a penis like a peanut!"
Mom is understandably confused for a second, then asks
"What, you mean it's shaped like a peanut?"
"No silly, it's salty!"
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Little Johnny is approached by the lifeguard at the public swimming pool. "You're not allowed to pee in the pool," said the lifeguard "I'm going to report you." "But everyone pees in the pool" said Little Johnny. "Maybe," said the lifeguard "but not from the diving board!"
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Little Johnny returns from school and says he got an F in arithmetic. "Why?" asks the father. "The teacher asked 'How much is 2x3' & I said '6'" replies Johnny. "But that's right!" "Yeah, but then she asked me 'How much is 3x2?'" "What's the fucking difference?" asks the father. "That's exactly what I said!"
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Little Johnny goes to school, and the teacher says "Today we are going to learn multi- syllable words, class. Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable word?" Johnny says "Mas-tur-bate." Miss Rogers smiles and says "Wow, little Johnny, that's a mouthful." Little Johnny says "No, Miss Rogers, you're thinking of a blowjob."
teeth, & make you fat."
Little Johnny replied: "My grandfather lived to be 107 years old." The man asked: "Did your grandfather eat 6 candy bars at a time?" Little Johnny answered: "No, he minded his own fucking business!"
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Little Jenny comes home from playing at Johnny's house.
"Hey Mom, guess what! Johnny's got a penis like a peanut!"
Mom is understandably confused for a second, then asks
"What, you mean it's shaped like a peanut?"
"No silly, it's salty!"
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Little Johnny is approached by the lifeguard at the public swimming pool. "You're not allowed to pee in the pool," said the lifeguard "I'm going to report you." "But everyone pees in the pool" said Little Johnny. "Maybe," said the lifeguard "but not from the diving board!"
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Little Johnny returns from school and says he got an F in arithmetic. "Why?" asks the father. "The teacher asked 'How much is 2x3' & I said '6'" replies Johnny. "But that's right!" "Yeah, but then she asked me 'How much is 3x2?'" "What's the fucking difference?" asks the father. "That's exactly what I said!"
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Little Johnny goes to school, and the teacher says "Today we are going to learn multi- syllable words, class. Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable word?" Johnny says "Mas-tur-bate." Miss Rogers smiles and says "Wow, little Johnny, that's a mouthful." Little Johnny says "No, Miss Rogers, you're thinking of a blowjob."
